Author Archives: Lorna

Too Young to Drink, Drive or Enlist, but Old Enough to Fix the Family?

  Many readers will disagree with the premise of this article. I’ve lost clients over this point, even long-term clients who generally agree with the family systems perspective. Certainly, there are literally thousands of therapists who hold an opposing opinion. But over time I’ve become more clear on this issue: Minor children can’t legally drink alcohol,

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Is it Therapy, or Text a Friend? What’s Going on With the New Wave of Text Therapy Services?

A quick google search for “text therapy” brings up an advertisement for the “best Virtual Therapy Services of 2021”. (https://www.top10.com/online-therapy). Celebrities routinely promote these services as affordable, convenient, and life changing. Many of the sites are tailored to specific groups providing couple, LGBTQ, Christian, and teen therapy. (To learn more about a systems view of therapy

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Finding Individuality During Pandemic-Induced Family Togetherness

When shelter-in-place began families almost celebrated the opportunity for increased time together. Adults lucky enough to work from home and able to afford it (big ifs) embraced the opportunity to slow down. Parents relished the breather from carpool, after-school activities, errands, social obligations and the keeping-up-with-the-Jones’ rat race. They instituted game nights, Zoom chats with

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You’re Not the Boss of Me/You Don’t Care About Me

Togetherness and Individuality are Fundamental Life Forces As recently as this June I had been anticipating a relatively laid-back summer. No big plans on the horizon after a lovely summer vacation. The Yiddish expression for what actually happened is, “Mann Tracht, Un Gott Lacht.” (“Man plans and God laughs.”) Instead of weeks of imagined leisure

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How to Help Silicon Valley Turn Your Kid into a Tech Addict

It’s not just Xbox, PlayStation, Apple, Google or Reddit turning kids into tech addicts. Parents are doing their part, too. Many, many parents worry their children have unhealthy obsessions with their electronics.  Frequent and fierce power struggles over tech time are the new normal. Tech manufacturers work hard to make their products as enticing as

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“I” Power

“I” Power. The humble pronoun: “I” “he” “she” ”it”” we” “you” “they” “us”.  What difference does a little tiny pronoun really make?  I believe that the smallest of all, the simple, “I,” stands the mightiest of them all. There is a special power in the “I” position. (It is the only one that is always

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