Many readers will disagree with the premise of this article. I’ve lost clients over this point, even long-term clients who generally agree with the family systems perspective. Certainly, there are literally thousands of therapists who hold an opposing opinion. But over time I’ve become more clear on this issue: Minor children can’t legally drink alcohol,
It’s not just Xbox, PlayStation, Apple, Google or Reddit turning kids into tech addicts. Parents are doing their part, too. Many, many parents worry their children have unhealthy obsessions with their electronics. Frequent and fierce power struggles over tech time are the new normal. Tech manufacturers work hard to make their products as enticing as
This is Us is a beloved, popular new TV show. If the reader is one of the few who haven’t seen it already, a family of five is featured; parents Jack and Rebecca and their 3 children, Randall, Kevin, and Kate. Kate and Kevin are biological twins while the orphaned Randall, born on the same
What’s Wrong With Being a Mama Grizzly For Your Kids? Silvina, a self-proclaimed “mama grizzly,” came in for a consultation because she was so worried about her daughter. Laura, 22, had recently moved back home after she’d lost her job as a sales representative. Silvina reported that Laura was sleeping late, refusing to apply for
The following are some of the characteristics of overly permissive parents that I consider most important. Most of the parents are devoted to doing the best for their children. In relationship with the parents, the youngster is driven by anxiety in demanding rights and freedom, and the material advantages of being grown up. Initially the
Jenny* and Stefan are parents having difficulty with their 7 year-old son, Nicholas. They have come into therapy to create change in their family system. This is their second therapy session. Lorna (Therapist), to Jenny and Stefan: Last session you told me about problems you’re having with your son, Nicholas. I encouraged you to
When there’s a problem with a child, I see the parents for coaching in therapy. As leaders of the family, parents have the power and ability to create change in the family system. Jenny* and Stefan are having difficulty with their 7 year-old son, Nicholas. I explain during the initial phone call that if
Selma, 38, has come in to therapy because of an on-going conflict with her daughter, Salina. Salina is 19 years-old and, according to her mother, her behavior has recently spiraled out of control. Selma was married to Salina’s father, William, until Salina was 9. That’s when William got caught having an affair with a co-worker
Q: My husband and I are having a lot of problems lately. I asked him to come to marriage counseling but he says I’m the one with the problem so I should just go by myself. How can we work on our relationship if he won’t even admit he has a problem? Q: My daughter,
Margo didn’t really want therapy for herself. She had called about her 23 year-old son, Stephan. She was hoping I’d see him for therapy to help “straighten him out”. I told her I don’t work with kids that age if they are still living at home and financially dependent on their parents, which was the
