Tag Archives: Emotional Triangles

This Is Us, Systems Style

This is Us is a beloved, popular new TV show.  If the reader is one of the few who haven’t seen it already, a family of five is featured; parents Jack and Rebecca and their 3 children, Randall, Kevin, and Kate. Kate and Kevin are biological twins while the orphaned Randall, born on the same

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How to get the most out of Therapy Using Family Systems Theory

Here are some helpful suggestions about how get the most out of your work in therapy: During sessions: If you are coming in as a couple for marriage counseling or relationship counseling, strengthen your ability to listen while your partner talks with the therapist.  Refrain from interrupting and check with your internal reactions as you’re

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Your Family is an Emotional System

Q:  My husband and I are having a lot of problems lately.  I asked him to come to marriage counseling but he says I’m the one with the problem so I should just go by myself.  How can we work on our relationship if he won’t even admit he has a problem? Q:  My daughter,

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Are you a Reckless Rescuer?

Margo didn’t really want therapy for herself.  She had called about her 23 year-old son, Stephan.  She was hoping I’d see him for therapy to help “straighten him out”.  I told her I don’t work with kids that age if they are still living at home and financially dependent on their parents, which was the

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Growing Apart: A Case of Not Enough, or Too Much?

Shayna is 32 years old and attending her first therapy appointment.  She’s decided to enter therapy because she’s been feeling depressed and lethargic.  She reports that she’s avoiding her friends and not participating in the activities she used to enjoy.  She’s also gained about 25 pounds which has her really upset.  She knows it would

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Stepfamily Challenges

“…triangles are the smallest stable building block of any emotional system….a two-person system is stable as long as anxiety is low, but when it rises it automatically draws in the most vulnerable third person and becomes a triangle.  Although the triangular process in families is always shifting, it also involves patterns that repeat over time,

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